In life you always have those two options: You can fight your fears while looking them deep into the eye or turn around and run away from them. But only the first one will bring you forward. So which one do you choose?
Just Sing…
I just recorded some vocals for myself. I got the instrumental of one of my demos and practiced singing to it. I really feel weird sometimes admitting that I am so unsure when it comes to singing. I made it far enough to feel good about my songwriting. I am feeling more comfortable about playing the guitar but singing makes slow progress. Well, at least it’s making progress, right?!
All my life I’ve been creating things. Painting pictures, doing handicrafts, writing short stories. I even made up my own dance moves once and I never felt insecure while doing so. I loved it and only that mattered to me.
Singing has been a part of my life since I can remember. I spent a long time of my childhood singing in two choirs. Again I loved it and so I just sang. I sang that way until the day, I’ve been told I wasn’t good enough for the first time in my life. I still don’t know what I had done wrong or what exactly it was that made those guys from the studio took me out of the project our youth choir was recording. They just told me to stop singing, and liked it better that way. I felt hurt and sad. I had to leave the recording area and sat behind the window in the control room watching all the other children keep on singing and have fun. The next day I stayed home crying.
Looking back I now know that this day brand marked me and still I am unable to ignore the pain. Years later I’ve been told more than once that I couldn’t sing but also that people liked my voice. I’ve always known that I am not the best singer. You know, there are people who don’t really need to work hard for their singing skills they simply sound good. I am one of those who needs to put a lot of hard work and time in themselves. I have always been that way and this is why I never ever thought about leaving music behind and giving it up. Still those words hurt and are deep inside of me. But one lovely day I maybe will be able to let go off them and simply make music again. Just sing…
Memories …
Memories are pictures of the mind
to remember the past in a slightly blurred light.
